Farewell to Ashcroft urban legend

The satirical report on the Democratic Underground website may have seemed bizarre to outsiders, but it was old news to Attorney General John Ashcroft.

According to a fictitious poll by CNN, Time and Cat Fancy Magazine, 52 percent of calico cats surveyed were afraid -- even deathly afraid -- of the attorney general and another 36 percent were "somewhat afraid." Some cats said they believed Ashcroft is, in fact, a sign of the devil.

"There have been reported cases of young kittens actually dying of fear when Ashcroft appears on television," said the fake news story. "Luckily for them, they have nine lives."

Behind the satire was an Internet report that spread as a rumor that became an "urban legend" about the Pentecostal Christian who was the highest of lightning rods during the first administration of President George W. Bush. Ashcroft will soon leave the cabinet, but this episode offers a window into how the religious and secular left viewed his faith and even the faith of his boss.

The rumor? Here is how it was stated by the San Fernando Valley Folklore Society (www.snopes.com): "Attorney General John Ashcroft believes calico cats are a sign of the devil." The site says this rumor is "false" and calls it "one of the most bizarre items we've had to tackle in recent memory."

The key to understanding urban legends is that the people who spread them sincerely want to believe they are true, said Barbara Mikkelson, a curator at this urban legends research site. They don't believe they are spreading lies.

"People have a tendency to immediately believe rumors about people that they don't like or that they don't respect," she said. "We tend to spread the stories that, on some level, we agree with. It tells us that we are right.

"So along comes this story that is perfect and it confirms all of those views that we already hold. Of course we want to share it. It's just too perfect."

In the Internet age, legions of people click "forward" and pass the rumor along to friends through email, many of whom do the same or even post it somewhere on the World Wide Web.

Urban legends are especially popular among religious conservatives, millions of whom believe that mainstream media conspire to hide the best and the worst of the news. Thus, digital true believers excitedly circulate reports about NASA confirming biblical miracles, evil activists asking the Federal Communications Commission to zap religious media and a born-again president boldly sharing his faith with troubled teens.

But this particular legend sprang up on the left, beginning with web columnist and Democratic National Committee treasurer Andrew Tobias. Citing anonymous sources, he wrote that members of Ashcroft's advance team had confirmed that their boss "believes calico cats are signs of the devil" and wants them removed from his path.

When pushed, Tobias declined to be more specific about sources. The tale of the demonic cats leapt into cyberspace and assumed a life of its own, as anyone can learn by typing "Ashcroft," "calico" and "Satan" (or "devil") into a computer search engine.

The attorney general laughed off the rumors -- again and again. Finally, a reporter from The American Enterprise asked if he had any idea how the rumor began.

"Absolutely none. ... In any case, there's no truth to it," said Ashcroft, a graduate of Yale and the University of Chicago Law School. "I owned a calico cat on the farm I lived on until I went away to be the state auditor of Missouri."

Still, the urban legend grew. It even reached the New York Times.

The natural tendency, said Mikkelson, is to focus on who starts the rumor. The more important question is this: Who is spreading the urban legend and why are they doing so? The Ashcroft rumor is especially interesting because it was spread by powerful people in the mainstream of politics and media.

"What we have here is a mirror held up to the people who are spreading it," she said. "What it shows us is something about their values and their hopes and their fears about the world around them. ... Even if the story isn't true, they believe that it ought to be true. They want it to be true."

Touched by an urban legend

Did you know NASA scientists proved that God really made the sun stand still just like it says in the book of Joshua?

Have you responded to the urgent prayer appeal from Mrs. Fatima Abass Yakubu Idris, the wealthy Nigerian widow cancer victim who wants to donate $7.2 million to your church?

Did you hear about the upcoming movie in which Jesus and his disciples are gay?

Surely you've seen this email bulletin: "CBS will be forced to discontinue 'Touched by an Angel' for using the word God in every program." Now, the disciples of atheist Madalyn Murray O'Hair have "been granted a federal hearing on the same subject by the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) in Washington D.C. Their petition, Number 2493, would ultimately pave the way to stop the reading of the gospel of our Lord and Savior, on the airwaves of America."

It's hard to believe that after 30 years and 30 million letters to the FCC, this false report continues to haunt pulpits, pews and the Internet.

Believe it. The O'Hair, FCC and "Touched by an Angel" email is back in the top 10 at the San Fernando Valley Folklore Society's sprawling "urban legends" site (www.snopes.com). And with the Angels era ending at CBS, Cathy Holden is bracing herself for more right-wing email blaming the show's demise on a vast left-wing conspiracy.

This will all end up in a revised entry at www.TruthMiners.com, her website that strives to convince other conservative Christians that passing along half-truths, scams and urban legends is not a doctrinally sound thing to do. Her niche-audience page includes 100 of the most common emails and links to larger secular research sites.

"This story will not die. I mean, 'Touched by an Angel' has been on for nine years," she said. "Anybody who reads a newspaper knows that everybody who's involved says it's time to end the show. But people who send these emails don't read newspapers. Then they get an email about that atheist O'Hair lady and they say, 'That's it!'

"You just want to tell them, 'Get over it. Go on with your life.' "

Holden became fascinated with urban legends when she helped a Baptist church outside Orlando start its website. The minute she signed on the junk emails rolled in, including a new incarnation of the O'Hair report. It took five minutes online to dig up the truth.

The church lady who forwarded the rumor said she did it for fun. What's the harm?

"I said, 'Wait just a minute. I just told you this is a lie and you don't care?' ... Ever since, I've been trying to get people to realize that a lie is a lie. This is not harmless. People get hurt. Christians have to believe truth matters," said Holden.

The O'Hair story originally was read in pulpits, shared at prayer meetings and printed on church mimeograph machines. Now people simply click "forward" and their email goes global.

Most of these messages take two forms -- outrage and inspiration. A major theme is that mainstream media hide the truth, said Holden.

"There's that vast conspiracy out there ... and it's keeping us from hearing all of the really bad stuff that our enemies are doing. The media also keep us from hearing any inspiring stories about good things that are happening. All that gets covered up, too. So we have to pass on these stories by email in order to beat the conspiracy. You see?"

So untraceable stories spread about President Bush leaving a reception line to evangelize a teen-ager, a pastor's wife preaching to passengers on the doomed Alaskan Airlines Flight 261 and a little girl's testimony converting actor John Wayne. The list goes on and on.

"The bigger the story the more we like it," said Holden. "We can be really syrupy, sappy people and we tend to fall for things that grab our heartstrings. It's all about our feelings. ... My ultimate hope is that if we can get people to care about what is going on in their Internet lives, then this new concern about truth may actually spread into other parts of their lives at home and at work and at church. Wouldn't that be interesting?"